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5 Emotional Control Techniques

By · February 23, 2010 · Filed in energy · 1 Comment »

Have you ever reacted to a person or situation in a particular way and later regretted the manner in which you handled it?  Did you let your emotions get in the way of making good decisions?  If you answered yes, you are not alone.  Emotions such as anger, sadness, anxiety and fear can cause people to act rashly and make decisions they wouldn’t otherwise make.

The choices you make regarding your future are far too important to let emotions get in the way.  Making decisions regarding your future should be handled while you are relaxed and confident rather than emotionally high or low.  These emotions can interfere with your ability to think clearly and rationally.

So how do you control these emotions?  How can you deal positively with their effects and bring yourself under control?  Below are five powerful techniques for emotional control that have been proven to work.

1.  NLP Swish Technique

The NLP or Neuro-Linguistic Programming technique called the Swish, is a very popular emotional controltechnique.  In the Swish, you are taught to replace an unwanted thought or response with a more appropriate and useful one, thus redirecting your thought process.  You are sending a message to the brain that essentially says, “Don’t do that, do THIS.”

This is a valuable technique that teaches you to manage your own thinking and consciously change the wayyou react to various situations.  Each time you use the Swish, you are training your brain to switch or re-direct from harmful emotional responses to solutions that are well thought out and rational.

Using the Swish

1. The first step is to develop your own Replacement Feeling.  Ideally, how would you like to act in the face of stress?  Use visualization to clearly see yourself experiencing this new feeling.

2. Discover the trigger for the unwanted mood.  Ask yourself. “What seems to always occur immediately prior to the stress I feel?”

3. While viewing the unwanted image in your mind, insert the replacement feeling into the corner of that picture.  If the undesirable image was a post card, look at the healthy replacement feeling as a stamp in the corner of the card.

4. Now Swish the two images.  Slowly allow the replacement feeling to grow and gradually take up more of the post card.  Continue until the new feeling is the primary and foremost image.

It takes practice, but regular implementation of this technique will help you become more relaxed and empowered in the face of stress and negativity.

2.  The Sedona Method

The Sedona method is a technique geared to help people let go of unwanted feelings and emotions and replace them with more positive ones.  It is performed using a series of questions meant to help increase your awareness of the present moment.

Most experts will agree that when people are frustrated they act in a frustrated manner. The same is true of other emotions.  Using the questions promoted by the Sedona Method, people are able to clearly define each situation for what it really is and act accordingly.  The ability to alter the way things are perceived can reduce stress foster confidence.

3.  EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) Tapping

The technique known as EFT Tapping has been around for quite a while, and many swear by the results. Simply stated, it involves tapping various parts of the body—wrist, eyebrow, cheek, etc—while uttering certain statements aloud.  This technique is thought to alter normal reactions to stimuli and promote healing.  The tapping is thought to release the power within—a power to help make calmer more productive decisions.

4.  Visualization

We can change the way we will react to a stressful situation simply by seeing it first.  Picture yourself reacting calmly and confidently in a situation that normally causes you distress.  Give the picture as much detail as possible, making it look truly achievable.  If you train yourself to see positive results before they happen they have a much better chance of materializing.

Tips for visualization:

· Find a quiet comfortable place

· Clear your mind and breathe deeply

· Create a clear picture of what you want to happen

· Recognize distractions and let them go

· Repeat often

5.  Freeze Framing

Think of the thoughts in your head as individual frames in a movie.  What would you do if you could freeze one particular frame that caused you distress?

The Freeze Frame technique allows you to do just that.  With your eyes closed picture a frame that has given you emotional trouble and freeze it.  While the image is in your mind, breathe deeply and recognize each breath.  As you begin to relax, you will find you are able to deal more appropriately with the emotions that scene produces.  Picture yourself acting calmly and decisively in the face of troubling thoughts or events.

Why and How a Stranger Knows You Best…

Stranger knows best: Other people know more about what will make us happy than we do

CAMBRIDGE, Mass. — Want to know what will make you happy? Then ask a total stranger — or so says a new study from Harvard University, which shows that another person’s experience is often more informative than your own best guess.

The study, which appears in the current issue of Science, was led by Daniel Gilbert, professor of psychology at Harvard and author of the 2007 bestseller “Stumbling on Happiness,” along with Matthew Killingsworth and Rebecca Eyre, also of Harvard, and Timothy Wilson of the University of Virginia.

“If you want to know how much you will enjoy an experience, you are better off knowing how much someone else enjoyed it than knowing anything about the experience itself,” says Gilbert. “Rather than closing our eyes and imagining the future, we should examine the experience of those who have been there.”

Previous research in psychology, neuroscience, and behavioral economics has shown that people have difficulty predicting what they will like and how much they will like it, which leads them to make a wide variety of poor decisions. Interventions aimed at improving the accuracy with which people imagine future events have been generally unsuccessful.

So rather than trying to improve human imagination, Gilbert and his colleagues sought to eliminate it from the equation by asking people to predict how much they would enjoy a future event about which they knew absolutely nothing — except how much a total stranger had enjoyed it. Amazingly enough, those people made extremely accurate predictions.

In one experiment, women predicted how much they would enjoy a “speed date” with a man. Some women read the man’s personal profile and saw his photograph, and other women learned nothing whatsoever about the man, but did learn how much another woman (whom they had never met) had enjoyed dating him. Women who learned about a previous woman’s experience did a much better job of predicting their own enjoyment of the speed date than did woman who studied the man’s profile and photograph.

Interestingly, both groups of women mistakenly expected the profile and photo to lead to greater accuracy, and after the experiment was over both groups said they would strongly prefer to have the profile and photograph of their next date.

In the second experiment, two groups of participants were asked to predict how they would feel if they received negative personality feedback from a peer. Some participants were shown a complete written copy of the feedback. Other were shown nothing, and learned only how a total stranger had felt upon receiving the feedback. The latter group more accurately predicted their own reactions to the negative feedback. Once again, participants mistakenly guessed that a written copy of the feedback would be more informative than knowledge of a total stranger’s experience.

“People do not realize what a powerful source of information another person’s experience can be,” says Gilbert, “because they mistakenly believe that everyone is remarkably different from everyone else. But the fact is that an alien who knew all the likes and dislikes of a single human being would know a great deal about the species. People believe that the best way to predict how happy they will be in the future is to know what their future holds, but what they should really want to know is how happy those who’ve been to the future actually turned out to be.”

Gilbert’s research was funded by the National Science Foundation.