Good Mental Health Starts With the Heart – What is Your Passion?

What is your purpose in life?

It’s a question people regularly ask themselves, but regrettably, the process of answering this question seldom extends beyond the “dream” stage.  It’s an important question though—one if ever answered could unlock unlimited possibilities for the future.  So why don’t more people go the extra mile and find answers to this question?

Most people would claim they’re too busy­—too busy going through the motions of their lives, doing the normal things that normal people do.  They get married, buy a house, have a few kids and work at a job they hate to support a dream that was never theirs—it was just what they were supposed to do. What people don’t realize is that neglecting your dreams will eventually lead you to feelings of “I want to… but I can’t” or “I can’t…. but I want to”.

Thankfully there are some folks who veer away from this traditional scenario, deciding to take a different path, a path borne of the heart.  You see these people all the time.  They’re the ones in the limousines or on the big screen; the ones in the corner offices or living in the three-story mansions.  They’re the ones you look up to and aspire to be; the ones always smiling, like they have a secret they want to share.  The secret:  follow your heart and the rest will follow.

If you decide—really decide—that you want to make your life extraordinary, and follow you heart towards limitless success and happiness, I have some good news.  Following your passion is really only a two-step process that you can begin right now.

The first step is to dream big—really, really, really big.

Sounds easy but the task may be a lot harder than you may realize. You see the problem is that most people take themselves out of the game before it even begins. Sometimes when considering our future we become frustrated, thinking about all the potential obstacles and limitations down the road that may impede our progress. We doom ourselves before we even begin.  This is not only unnecessary but extremely unproductive. The only limits you have are the ones you put on yourselves.

The first step in dreaming big is to give yourself permission to dream. Imagine a future without any restrictions, limitations or obstacles. Get a clear, descriptive picture in your head of everything you want. Picture yourself enjoying your dream job, living in the mansion on the hill, driving your expensive car and enjoying your family and loved ones.  In this stage of the process, everything is possible.  Now, write it down, get excited and proceed to step two.

Every great story starts with a great idea, so must the story of your life.  Dreaming about what you want is neither selfish nor irresponsible.  It is a normal, healthy activity.  Our dreams are what make life tolerable, a reason to get out of bed.  Without them, life would be simply unbearable.  But acting upon those dreams doesn’t always seem so easy.  Many people begin this process—they begin with a flash, fueled by the uncontainable motivation to succeed—but all too often, life, with it’s schedules and responsibilities, gets in the way, and the dream dies before it ever had a chance to flourish.

The secret to succeeding with step two of this process—acting on your dreams—is momentum.  Many of us are good out of the gate, but lack the endurance to finish the race.  We get sidetracked by a world that seems bent on crushing our dreams.  At least, that’s what we tell ourselves.  The truth is that we limit our own progress because we fail to construct a detailed plan for getting what we want.  If you wanted to visit, say, Oklahoma, and you’d never been before, how would you proceed?  Would you get in your car and drive aimlessly, hoping to come upon it by accident?  Probably not—you’d probably look at a map and develop a plan for getting there.  Why, then, don’t we take the same approach with our lives?

Once you’ve identified your passion, you must put together a written plan for achieving it.  Start by identifying your long term goal and give it a deadline.  For example:

Long-term Goal:

Purchase my dream house Deadline:  7/25/2011

By writing it down, you have made it real.  It may also help to confide in some of the people whom you trust.  They can help hold you accountable and assist in keeping you on track.  Next, develop a series of short-term objectives, necessary for reaching your long-term goal.  Start with things you can do right now and be specific.  Take a look:

Short-term Objectives:

1. Talk to a financial consultant or realtor to determine exactly how much money I’ll need to buy my house. Deadline:  August 1, 2009.

2. Talk to employer about overtime and advancement opportunities at work:  Deadline:  August 15, 2009.

3. Put $1,000 in the bank.  Deadline:  September 1, 2009.

You get the idea.  Now, follow through.  Commit to making these objectives a priority in your life and make progress toward each of them daily.  Keep the goals in front of you as you cross or check them off as a symbol of your progress. Celebrate your achievements! Be proud remembering that each objective you reach brings you closer to your dream, and every forward step you take creates sustainable momentum that will fuel you to persevere.

You can apply this system to any arena of your life.  Follow your passion by first, identifying—in detail—everything you want to accomplish, and then draw yourself a detailed “map” to help you get there.  Don’t become discouraged by obstacles.  Instead, view them as challenges—opportunities for growth—and keep moving forward.  Get excited about your life!  You deserve it.

Five Self-Esteem Strategies for Students p2

The rigors of school present can present many complex and unique challenges for today’s students. Maintaining a balance between the burdens of course work and the social demands of peers can be extremely difficult no matter who you are.  Consequently, within this challenging environment, the necessity for creating and sustaining healthy self-esteem takes on significant importance.

Low self-esteem, whether stemming from poor grades or a lack of popularity, can be a very serious issue.  Studies show that students with an unhealthy self image are more likely to engage in high-risk behaviors such as smoking, drinking alcohol and using illicit drugs.  If the condition is not addressed, students may present with symptoms of anxiety and depression, develop physical ailments, and even contemplate suicide.

The enormous pressures that youths face on a daily basis can accumulate and often seem unbearable. To weather this storm, it is crucial that students develop ways to maintain a healthy self image—to build their self-esteem.  The first part of this series discussed the first two tips you can use to create and maintain a healthy self-image. Below are three more tips you can use to construct and nourish more positive self-esteem:

3.  Create a Network of “True” Friends

If your current network of friends includes people you feel you need to impress or who pressure you to act in ways you ordinarily wouldn’t, you may want to reconsider your affiliation.  Trying to be someone you’re not, just for the sake of popularity, is unhealthy and unnecessary.  It can cause anxiety and your feelings of self-worth may suffer.  You should never have to try that hard.

True friends are the ones you can always count on to be there for you.  They are the people that enrich your life, not by how they look or what they wear, but by their loyalty and integrity.  You rely upon them to help celebrate your success and for a sympathetic ear in times of affliction.  Having people in your life that help motivate you towards triumph, and cushion the blow when you when you fall, will do a world of good for your self-esteem.

4.  Be Honest and Keep Your Word

Have you ever told a lie and then, when you thought it may come to light, told another just to protect the first?  If you answered no, I congratulate you, but if you answered in the affirmative, rest assured, you are in the majority.

How did these lies make you feel?  A bit stressed? Anxious? I’m guessing they did.  These “little white lies” may seem harmless on the surface, but they can create tribulations for you down the road.

The problem is, while trying to juggle these minor inconsistencies, told, perhaps, to escape an obligation or appear more popular, you are elevating your level of stress, which can in turn damage your self-esteem.

The truth, however, has dual benefits.  As the American Playwright David Mamet once quipped, “Always tell the truth—it’s the easiest thing to remember.”  Well said.  When you tell the truth, you never have to get your story straight.  Also, while the truth is not always convenient, it will, at the very least, bolster your sense of integrity.  Tell the truth and keep your word.  You may not always be popular, but you will be respected.

5.  Take Time for Gratitude

When you truly appreciate just how special and how unique you are, it can feel very powerful.  You feel like you can accomplish anything.  But there is another emotion, one equally powerful, that is perhaps even more significant—the feeling of gratitude, expressed to those who helped to shape you.

Remember, you didn’t become who you are without help, and taking time to give regular thanks for the blessings in your life will help unlock a spiritual lift that will forever sustain you.